I’ll be the first to admit that 9/10 times I’ll jump to the worst case scenario for any given situation faster than a rocket powered penguin. Yes, I stole that from the British Gas advert; I just love penguins. I digress.
To be honest, it’s just something I’m really good at. I like to think of it as preparation. I mean, if these ridiculous situations ever do come about then at least I thought about it ahead of time right? Ok, I might not have sorted a solution just yet, but in terms of the element of surprise, the ball is totally in my court.
^^ see what I did there? For a split second, I just convinced you (or at least I’m hoping so) that a quality of mine that the majority of people would consider to be a negative, or a flaw, if you will, was actually a strength. You see, I’m really good at that too.
I fall somewhere into the centre of a Venn diagram that has optimist, pessimist and realist circles, and while I think that that could be conceived as incredibly strange, I believe that to be totally normal. (Side note: I’m far from normal, and that’s ok). I guess whether the glass is full or empty, or any variation of the two, if I’m thirsty there are also plastic cups, bottles, mugs or just sticking my head under the tap if I really have to. I think what I’m trying to say is that I can always find solutions, or I can spin things in a way that will make me feel better if I can’t. And who doesn’t love spinning?
I’ve been thinking about a few of these situations recently; the ones that I’m yet to have a definitive solution for, and as I very much doubt I’m alone in some of these, I thought I’d share them. Here’s hoping they help someone!
I have no idea what I’m doing with my life.
Yep, I’m going straight in with the big’un. I am 22, and this hits home more than ever having just hit my 4th anniversary at the retail job that was meant to be a part-time sixth form/gap year job. The fact is for me, it’s got nothing to do with lack of direction; I frequently pull the line ‘oh I’m just trying to work things out, I’ve got plenty of time’. It works a treat when my parents friends or former teachers ask me what I’m up to now, but the truth is its a load of codswallop (I got the spelling of that right on the first attempt, woop!). There are a tonne of things I could do with my life, and better yet there are a few that stand out as things I would love to do with my life, and where I’m struggling is committing to just one. How on earth is that a bad thing?
Ok, so this one isn’t true for me anymore, but trust me when I say I’ve done my time in this situation. For starters, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being single, and the 1+year between my previous relationship and my current one was the time when I truly discovered this. More than that, I discovered myself. I travelled, I made new friends, I became a stronger, more independent person, and none of these traits are going away now I’m in a relationship again. And as well as discovering more about myself, I discovered more about what I actually wanted from a relationship; instead of becoming that needy single girl who jumps at any chance, I actually took the time to think about dealmakers and breakers, and that too has shaped me.
Bonus point on this: why was I single? Because I was waiting for Mr Right to come up and smack me in the face. Fact is, sometimes you do need to go and put yourself out there; hit a few bars, download Tinder, whatever you want, just stop waiting around if you want to change your situation.
I still live at home.
And what? I’ll be the first to put my hand up and say that I love living at home. Yes I’d love to move out one day, and yes sometimes I wish that day was sooner than others, but my living situation is far from awful; I’d much rather be at home than in some god awful house share with people I have to leave passive aggressive notes for and end up living in my room because I can’t deal with awkward interaction. You know how most people have group chats with their housemates? Well so do I, they just happen to consist of my parents and sister, and I can tell you for a fact they contain just as many emojis as everyone else’s thank you very much.
How do you feel about things now? Better, I hope!